By: Marla Garden
Time’s 2016 Person of the Year was Donald Trump, which is disturbing. But hey, Hitler was Time’s Person of the Year in 1938. I digress…
On a positive note, Madonna was named Billboard’s 2016 Woman of the Year, she has become the highest grossing female touring artist of all time. Since the release of her first record in 1982, Madonna has received much criticism for her unconventional style and openly sexual nature.
Madonna’s acceptance speech for Woman of the Year was heartfelt; she spoke about sexism and misogyny in the music industry, but those themes carry across to nearly all industries.
She said “There are no rules, if you’re a boy,” and went on to give some satirical advice for girls such as;
-“You are allowed to be pretty, and cute, and sexy, but don’t act too smart, don’t have an opinion.”
-“Be what men want you to be, but more importantly, be what women feel comfortable with you being around other men.”
-“Do not age because to age is a sin. You will be criticized, you will be vilified…”
Madonna explained that when she married Sean Penn, she was left alone by the media because she was no longer seen as a threat. It’s an interesting point and highlights general misunderstanding of women’s agency. To say that a woman has agency means that she has the capability and rights to choose what to do, how to dress, how to express herself. All humans have agency. When a woman is dating someone or married, they are unavailable, off the market, “spoken for.”
So, to be “taken” and suddenly not seen as a threat means that a woman’s agency is completely disregarded, it means that her partner is not considered to be a partner but rather an owner or a guardian. Humor me, but, anytime I’ve been in a relationship I never regarded myself as owned. Sure, I come from an Irish-Catholic family, and it took me years to understand why being told to “Speak when spoken to” was fucked up, but at this point in my life I don’t stand for being treated like an accessory.
Now, I’m going to step away from Madonna for a second and look at the bigger picture. Women are constantly scrutinized on their appearance, intellect, humor, sexuality, and evaluated for their worth. It seems that on any given day, being a woman and stepping outside is subjecting yourself to being treated like public property. Whether someone feels it’s necessary to yell at you, ogle at you, or ask for your number, being a woman doesn’t entail walking outside with confidence that your privacy will be respected.
When these nuanced forms of disrespect are brought into a professional setting, it’s even more frustrating as you try to stay professional and respectful to clients. Overall, I wish for more respect for women from men, and I genuinely believe the only way to achieve the respect you want is to demand it. If you are a woman, don’t tolerate being called bossy, desperate, or any other insult. Don’t tolerate being patronized. Don’t give people a pass for their bigotry.
Finally, I’ll leave you with the most poignant part of Madonna’s acceptance speech, “Women have been oppressed for so long they believe in what men have to say about them. And they believe they have to back a man to get the job done. There are some excellent men worth backing, but not because they’re men, but because they are worthy. As women, we have to start appreciating our worth and each other’s worth. Seek out strong women to befriend, to align yourself with, to learn from, to be inspired by, to collaborate with, to support, to be enlightened by. As I said before, it’s not so much about receiving this award as it is having this opportunity to stand before you and really say thank you as a women, as an artist, as a human.”
